I am not voting this November 3rd. The guilt is almost paralyzing.

I have voted in every election since I was 18. I rocked the vote in high school and college.

I made calls and begged for money for Obama.

I attended town halls for health care and local theatre and unleashed heavy anger on those anarchist who refused to vote.

I wrote a poem about it, yet

I am not voting this election.

I already ripped up my “application” to apply to be on the list to be sent a “registration form” to fill out and see if I am still eligible to

request a “mail in ballot”.

City hall is within walking distance

so I could easily go pick one up, or go wait in line to vote.

It is very convenient, yet

I am not voting in this election. I feel like I am being disloyal to a family credo that placed voting as the highest communion

over kindness.

A get out of jail free card to be greedy and judgmental.

I am not voting in this election not

because I love Trump or Hate Biden.

I feel that I have to defend my… choose… so that the club I pledged to as a teen won’t

send the tar and feathers to dis-embowel me or pull a henry8.

I am terrified as I write this that NASA surveillance is going to put me on the naughty list and

I won’t get any cold pizza at the volunteers party.

I have been consistent in my passion for voting and

took my responsibility very seriously. Have they earned my vote all these years? Will they notice that I skipped one election.

Will my name appear on there list of “target undecided” that cost,

i dunno a milly maybe two; but I am bad with money so

I will leave the statistics to the political organizers. Besides I never really had time to

account for the money that went in to securing my dutiful vote….. in their favor.

No favors for me though, how strange.

I could say that I am just too tired to vote, or too busy trying to make money and

feed myself. I can use the excuse that nothing ever changes so why bother. I can also use the excuse that with all that money my ‘party’….of choice raises,………… they have failed

to make my process of voting

any easier.

I could ask where does all that campaign money go and

why has not my favorite candidate sent someone to my door

to collect my vote and

give me money and

register me for a beneficial health plan.

They……. it doesn’t work that way. They ………say that

I am lazy. But I always vote.

Never too lazy for that.

Then I feel better for four years.

Working and

complaining and

arguing and

slaving until I get the privilege to vote again.

I am not voting in this election.

I am a bad girl.

I am a very bad girl. The elf on the shelf would be furious. Please don’t tell on me………